VALENTINE'S DAY QUOTES
quotations about Valentine's Day
Some McDonald's restaurants are taking reservations on Valentine's Day. They are getting a lot of tables for one.
CONAN O'BRIEN
Conan, February 13, 2014
For the two of us, home isn't a place. It is a person. And we are finally home.
STEPHANIE PERKINS
Anna and the French Kiss
Like a bad case of the clap, Valentine's Day is back to cause irritation and pain for the masses. Unlike the clap, however, this particular inflammation affects us all whether we're part of a couple or not, and at least half of us look around wondering what the hell we did to deserve being visited by such a wretched tradition. I am one of the legions of the perenially single on the day in question, and it used to make the Crotchety Bastard, well, even more crotchety than usual. But this year, rather than wallow in my bitter lack of companionship, I decided I would take a savage journey to the very heart of the pink and red nightmare to confront the ghastly components that make this damnable market driven holiday persist in haunting the psyches of fine upstanding citizens everywhere.
ALEXANDER KERN
"I Heart the Crotchety Bastard or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Be Indifferent to Valentine's Day", February 14, 2006
I got a Valentine's Day card from my girl. It said, "Take my heart! Take my arms! Take my lips!" Which is just like her. Keeping the best part for herself.
ROBERT ORBEN
2000 New Laughs for Speakers
I love you because the entire universe conspired to help me find you.
PAULO COELHO
The Alchemist
Valentine's Day is an awkward, sensitive holiday whether or not you have a significant other and, perhaps especially, if you are single. To be "without love" on a day designed to celebrate it as loudly and publicly as possible can make even the most secure single person question their life.
ALICIA ELER
"Subvert Valentine's Day: remake the celebration of love in your own image", The Guardian, February 14, 2016
This day dame Nature seemed in love,
The lusty sap began to move,
Fresh juice did stir th' embracing vines,
And birds had drawn their valentines.
H. WOTTON
A Dictionary of Quotations from the English Poets
Ah, the often-dreaded month of February is among us! Cue endless memes about drinking wine, listening to Adele, being alone with your cats and eating pizza with pepperoni hearts. I thought this would be a good time to address the eminent feelings of loneliness that may sweep over you on February 14. Or, maybe they won't sweep over you at all. Maybe you'll just be really happy and will totally survive on the wine-Adele-cat-pizza memes.
EMILY PERROTT
"Here's How To Embrace Being Single When Valentine's Day Is Approaching", Elite Daily, February 5, 2017
Oh, if it be to choose and call thee mine, love, thou art every day my Valentine!
THOMAS HOOD
"Sonnet for the 14th of February"
Each time you love, love as deeply as if it were forever.
AUDRE LORDE
"For Each of You"
The 99 Cent Only Store is calling itself your Valentine's Day headquarters. Guys, if that's your Valentine's Day headquarters, you can also call the garage your new home.
JAY LENO
The Tonight Show, February 13, 2012
Valentine's Day is the Christmas of Coupledom.
TONILYN HORNUNG
How to Raise a Husband: A Whole Bunch of Ways to Build a Strong and Happy
Don't feel bad if you have a crummy Valentine's Day. It (hopefully) won't be worse than getting killed, confused with other people, and kicked off the general liturgical calendar -- which is what actually happened to the real St. Valentine.
AINE CAIN
"The ancient story behind Valentine's Day is more brutal than romantic", Business Insider, February 12, 2017
I like Valentine's Day. The trouble is the florists and the candy-makers and the card people are all advertising so much, you don't dare let the day go by without making an offering, whether you mean it or not. Money exceeds affection.
ANDY ROONEY
"Valentine's Day", Years of Minutes: The Best of Rooney from 60 Minutes
Valentine's Day is weird. A nude flying baby that shoots arrows isn't a holiday. It's a horror movie.
JIMMY KIMMEL
Jimmy Kimmel Live!, February 13, 2012
Today's Valentine's Day. There's a whole day devoted solely to love. Does that make any sense? Nah. Love makes us all crazy. But it's fun too.
LISA GREENWALD
Sweet Treats & Secret Crushes
There is a lot of sentiment in the market that Valentine's Day has become too commercialised. A lot of people are moving away from material products and looking at alternatives such as treating a partner to a day of chocolate making rather than buying a box of chocolates.
CAMILLA TURNER
"The death of Valentine's Day as we know it?", The Telegraph, February 14, 2016
Here's my problem. On Valentine's Day the flowers are wilting and so am I.
DAVID LETTERMAN
The Late Show with David Letterman, February 13, 2012
For Valentine's Day a German company has made chocolate in shapes of couples making love. I don't like them ... I don't want my chocolate to have more fun than me.
JAY LENO
attributed, The Mammoth Book of Comic Quotes
Valentine's Day can prompt your favorite stalkers to reappear and step up their games, calling, texting or messaging you or sending lovely gifts that you then have to explain to your current significant other or your co-workers or your front desk person or the entire basketball stadium.
BRUCE Y. LEE
"If You're Not Happy During Valentine's Day, You're Not Alone", Forbes, February 14, 2017